Monday, June 15, 2009

10 Real-Life Mad Scientists


Science, we are informed by conscientious historians of the discipline, is something that comes to us without anything we might call a “moral imperative” as to what we should or should not be doing with the knowledge. In fact, science has often been described as an “amoral” enterprise, which can be put to evil uses just as easily as good ones. Scientists themselves bear no responsibility to ensure how their discoveries are used by others.

But what if the scientist himself is a diabolical mad man?

Thank the FSM it doesn’t happen often, but here’s a list of ten people throughout history who fit the description of “Mad Scientist” because they used diabolical methods for their experiments. We can be thankful that this sort of research is not applauded today, nor are science students encouraged in these directions. But, they surely are interesting as historical footnotes.


1. Johann Conrad Dippel [1673-1734]

The first and most prophetic fact about Doctor Dippel is that he was born at Castle Frankenstein near Darmstadt, Germany. He studied theology, philosophy and alchemy at the University of Giessen, and promptly found himself in trouble for his theological opinions. In his search for the philosopher’s stone of alchemy, he became interested in creating artificial life.

It is on that score that Dippel gained a reputation for grave robbery, and performing gruesome experiments on cadavers in an attempt to do a “soul transplant.” There were rumors of him being driven out of town by angered townsfolk after blowing up a tower at Castle Frankenstein with nitroglycerine, but careful historical research fails to make a firm connection between Dippel and this substance (not discovered until after his time), or between Dippel and Mary Shelley’s immortalized mad doctor Frankenstein. What Dippel did manage to do with his alchemical experiments was develop “Prussian blue” dye which became a spectacular commercial success.


2. Giovanni Aldini [1762-1834]

The nephew of the man who developed the theory of muscular electricity, Giovanni centered his scientific career around working with galvanism – electricity. He examined medical uses, ways to illuminate lighthouses, and did experiments using electricity for preservation.

Aldini became most famous – or infamous – for his traveling horror show, touring all across Europe electrifying human and animal bodies for the delight of the public. But it was his performance at the Royal College of Surgeons in London in 1803 that earned him his place in Mad Scientist history. He used his conducting rods on the body of a hanged criminal named George Foster, causing muscles to contract and distort and frightening some people badly. For his efforts as well as his showmanship, Aldini was made a knight by the emperor of Austria and a councilor of state at Milan.


3. Ilya Ivanovich Ivanov [1870-1932?]

Yet another Stalinist era Russian scientist made his name doing bizarre and arguably unethical experiments on animals. Ivanov perfected the art of artificial insemination to aid his work, and went on to produce hybrids like Zeedonks (zebra and donkey), Zubrons (wisent and cow), an antelope-cow, a mouse-rat, a mouse-guinea pig, and a guinea pig-rabbit.

Ivanov veered off the merely interesting track with his human-ape hybrid experiments. Seems Stalin had high hopes for an army of man-apes that would be invincible, insensitive to pain and wouldn’t care about the quality of their food or treatment. At an experimental station in French Guinea he inseminated female chimpanzees with human sperm, but could not manage to produce a pregnancy. The French colonial government objected when he proposed inseminating human females with sperm from an orangutan. His contribution was primarily to establish the limits of interfertility, which modern scientists now get around with direct genetic manipulation and cloning.


4. Sergei Brukhonenko [1890-1960]

This Russian scientist of the Stalinist era contributed important research toward the development of open heart surgery, and invented a primitive heart-lung machine he called the “autojektor.” Sergei Brukhonenko’s experiments in how to keep a body (or some part of a body) alive led to some exhibitions that offended the ethical sensibilities of many.

The most famous of those were his experiments with the severed heads of dogs. One of which was able to eat a piece of cheese for the audience, which was then horrified when the chewed cheese exited the truncated esophagus at the other end. He did dog head transplants too, and brought executed dogs back to life. It was primarily experimentation using humans, human bodies and animals that first dictated the regulation of scientific experimentation, and grisly stories on that score helped to make the ‘Evil Scientist’ a stock character in fiction and entertainment.


5. Vladimir Demikhov [1916-1998]

Another organ transplant pioneer from the days of Stalin, Demikhov was famous for transplanting whole portions of live puppies onto the bodies of adult dogs. He also transplanted various organs around. There are videos of some of the most gruesome experiments of Demikhov and his contemporary Brukhonenko, which we’ll not link here. After inviting journalists to his lab to show off his work, a reporter from the Daily Mail wrote:

“Blinking unhappily in the daylight as Demikhov paraded it on its lead, this unfortunate beast had been created by grafting the head and upper body of a small puppy on the head and body of a fully-grown mastiff, to form one grotesque creature with two heads. The visitors watched in horror and fascination as both of the beast’s mouths lapped greedily at a bowl of milk proffered by Demikhov’s assistants.” The article did not say whether any of the assistants were named Igor.


6. Harry Harlow [1905-1981]

Harry Harlow was a psychologist interested in the psychology of maternal-infant bonding, who contributed greatly to the burgeoning animal rights movement that grew out of the long history of scientific research cruelty to helpless animals. One does have to wonder about many of these researchers, as in how many of them tortured animals in childhood and were steered into science as a “healthy outlet” for this sort of behavior that in the wider society would have earned them some serious legal troubles.

Harlow’s most infamous experiments were conducted with rhesus monkeys. He isolated infants from their mothers and offered them a choice of surrogate mother figures – a wire mesh construct or a terrycloth covered construct, one which provided milk and one that did not. He was quite open about his experimental apparatuses, giving them appropriate names such as “rape rack,” “iron maiden” and an isolation chamber called the “pit of despair.” For all the outrage at his cruelty to infant monkeys, Harlow did establish the importance of maternal-infant bonding for humans and his work led to ethics regulations of scientific research.


7. Shiro Ishii [1892-1959]

You may suspect that scientists who feel empowered to dream up tortures for animals might be willing to do the same sort of experiments on humans if the public sensibilities weren’t so averse to such things. You would be right, and there are times in human history when the public is distracted by other things, allowing scientists to do their worst. We call it “war,” and it’s offered cover for things diabolical enough to make an atheist suspect Satan exists, even if God may not.

Making a name for himself in the Japanese military establishment between world wars, Shiro Ishii enjoyed the title “Father of Biological Warfare” for his exploits as chief of Japan’s biological warfare program. Ishii supervised the deliberate infection of thousands of captives with deadly diseases, conducted grotesque surgies, and performed as many as 3,000 ‘dissections’ of live prisoners without anesthetic. A wealthy man never prosecuted for war crimes, Ishii died peacefully at his home in Japan at the age of 67.


8. Joseph Mengele [1911-1979]

His title is still “The Angel of Death,” which he earned the hard way as a German SS officer and physician at the Auschwitz-Birkenau concentration camps during the Holocaust. Mengele’s favorite subjects for grotesque experiments were twins, and he experimented on at least 3,000 sets of them. 26 of whom survived. He injected chemicals into children’s eyes to see if he could change their color, sewed a pair of Roma twins together so they’d be cojoined, giving them gangrene. He performed most of his surgeries – including amputations – without anesthesia.

It is questionable that Mengele really thought he was doing science, as most historians simply believe he was mad with power. Despite being the most hunted at-large war criminal in the world for 34 years, he died in Bertioga, Brazil in 1979 and buried under the name of Wolfgang Gerhard. He never expressed regret or remorse for his horrible crimes. While the study of twins has contributed much to knowledge of genetics and the “nature vs. nurture” debates in biology, both the Eugenics movement of the early 20th century and the Holocaust are not spoken about with much reverence by modern researchers.


9. Sigmund Rascher [1909-1945]

World War II offered lots of opportunities for evil scientific experiments the governments involved apparently figured no one would ever care about, given the level of sheer inhuman violence abroad at the time. Sigmund Rascher became a captain in the German Luftwaffe, under whose auspices he began human experimentation for research on high altitude flight. He was a favorite of Heinrich Himmler, who gave him absolute power at the Dachau concentration camp to choose his victims.

Rascher killed scores of victims with his portable pressure chamber, more than a hundred with his “freezing experiments,” which actually did document best methods for warming someone suffering terminal hypothermia. While at Dauchau, Rascher also developed those ubiquitous cyanide capsules that have been so often lampooned as the suicide option of choice for spies and other assorted bad guys. Himmler caught Rascher and his wife lying about extending their fertility into their 50s (they’d bought or kidnapped the babies) and had them executed shortly before the end of the war.


10. Sidney Gottlieb [1918-1999]

The world’s horror at the atrocities committed by German and Japanese ‘doctors’ during WW-II didn’t stop the United States government from investing quite a bit in its own versions of blatantly unethical (and illegal) human experimental projects. Military psychiatrist and speech therapist Sidney Gottlieb was put in charge of the CIA’s MK-ULTRA project in 1953 to investigate “techniques that would crush the human psyche to the point that it would admit anything.”

In addition to coming up with some highly humorous assassination plots against Fidel Castro (always involving some kind of poison), Gottlieb graduated to dosing unsuspecting people with LSD, causing some serious death and mental destruction along the way. In 1973, just as the Congress was closing on on the project, records of MK-ULTRA were ordered destroyed by then DCIA Richard Helms. It is not known (because no one involved has bothered to say) if they ever found the “truth drug” they were searching for but it is known that the program experimented with heroin, morphine, temazepam, mescaline, psilocybin, scopolamine, marijuana, alcohol and sodium pentothal. What we got instead was a Drug War that is still claiming innocent lives today.


Sunday, June 14, 2009

The 12 Greatest College Movies Of All Time

Whether your college years were wild and crazy or studious and subdued, no doubt you can relate to some of these Greatest College Movies of All Time. Are you down for a Road Trip and a return to Old School frat life? Check ‘em out:

12. Accepted (2006)

Justin Long
Jonah Hill
Blake Lively
Anthony Heald
Lewis Black

Accepted isn’t as well-known as some of the others listed, but it does have a tiny place in our ranking of college movies. Check out the Mac guy (Justin Long) and pals (including Jonah Hill) as the rejected lot create their own college where anyone is accepted. Creating the fake South Harmon Institute of Technology (S.H.I.T.) website and building an actual campus goes to show that slackers have entrepreneurial spirit too.


11. Road Trip (2000)

Breckin Meyer
Seann William Scott
Amy Smart
Tom Green

The ultimate college road trip – where anything can go wrong. And everything does go wrong. Four friends hit the road to retrieve a sex tape sent to one of the buddies’ girlfriends, in an attempt to keep her from ever seeing his hookup. Can they get from point A to point B and save the long-distance relationship? All in all, it makes for one hilarious trip.


10. Rudy (1993)

Sean Astin
Jon Favreau
Ned Beatty
Charles S. Dutton

You can’t knock the inspiring true story of a college football underdog. Don’t even try it. Sean Astin shows how hard work and determination paid off for Daniel “Rudy” Ruettiger – an undersized kid from a blue collar family who got a chance from the football coach at the University of Notre Dame. Too inspirational for you?… Let’s move on.


9. Wonder Boys (2000)

Michael Douglas
Tobey Maguire
Frances McDormand
Robert Downey, Jr.

Okay, it’s not your fun-lovin, crazy college party movie, but this collegiate flick has a lot of heart. Young Tobey Maguire learns a lot from his tortured writing professor Michael Douglas – the bond between prof and student looking for inspiration has never been so interesting or quirky. Seriously? A dead dog in the trunk? You don’t get that in every college movie.


8. Back To School (1986)

Rodney Dangerfield
Sally Kellerman
Burt Young
Keith Gordon

Rodney Dangerfield is the ultimate rags-to-riches success, but his depressed college kid who wants to drop out inspires the old man to go to college too. Dear old dad throws money around to get into school and is such a fun loving rich dude that his son suddenly becomes more popular. Classic Dangerfield line: “Bring us a pitcher of beer every seven minutes until somebody passes out. And then bring one every ten minutes.”


7. National Lampoon’s Van Wilder (2002)

Ryan Reynolds
Tara Reid
Kal Penn

The ultimate college student, Van Wilder is a legend who has been at his college for 7 years. A professional college student, you could say, Van Wilder has the hots for pre-trainwreck Tara Reid, who is dating frat boy Richard. The war is on between Van Wilder and Richard… and oh, there has never been such a disgusting pastry filling ever prepared on film.


6. Revenge of the Nerds (1984)

Robert Carradine
Anthony Edwards
Timothy Busfield
Curtis Armstrong
Ted McGinley

What would happen if nerds got the upper hand? Impossible, you say? Well, check out Louis and Gilbert and some of their badass nerd friends (Poindexter, Lamar, Wormser, Booger, Takashi), who form their own fraternity and overthrow the jocks from Alpha Beta. Hell, even Lewis gets Ted McGinley’s girl, Betty. And c’mon, who doesn’t love Lamar’s rap?


5. Good Will Hunting (1997)

Matt Damon
Robin Williams
Ben Affleck
Stellan Skarsgård
Minnie Driver

A smarter college movie than most on this list, pals Ben Affleck and Matt Damon hit this one out of the park with the tale of a kid from the wrong side of the tracks with more smarts than anyone at MIT. He’s a janitor. He’s troubled. But he’s a friggin math genius. How do you like them apples?


4. Old School (2003)

Luke Wilson
Will Ferrell
Vince Vaughn
Ellen Pompeo
Jeremy Piven

What if you could go back to college and do it all over again? Luke Wilson, Will Ferrell and Vince Vaughn give it the old college try in Old School. The trio start a fraternity for anyone and everyone, letting the buddies relive their youth in the frat party scene (Ferrell streaking, anyone?). They get back at the Dean trying to shut them down and they (maybe?) actually grow up through the process.


3. Real Genius (1985)

Val Kilmer
Gabriel Jarret
William Atherton
Jon Gries

Genius Chris Knight, played hilariously by Kilmer, is the laid back prankster of the college scene. New student Mitch Taylor is the serious student paired with Chris Knight, who shows the uptight kid how to unclench. Along the way, they build a chemical laser, antagonize Kent and effectively shut down their professor’s evil plot. Bonus points for the big popcorn ending. Seriously – how cool was all that popcorn?


2. PCU (1994)

Jeremy Piven
David Spade
Chris Young
Jon Favreau

Before Jeremy Piven became Hollywood’s biggest douche, he stole the show in a little college movie called PCU. Reminiscent of Animal House, PCU features every faction of this politically correct campus against the slackers at “The Pit.” Pre-frosh Tom Lawrence (Chris Young) is thrown into the war between the preppy “Balls and Shaft” guys and The Pit residents - and although the college president (Jessica Walter) tries to shut them down, The Pit hosts a monster party to pay their debts and ultimately they get the president fired.


1. Animal House (1978)

John Belushi
Tim Matheson
John Vernon
Verna Bloom
Thomas Hulce

It’s the quintessential college movie – Animal House no doubt tops the list for this classic tale of frat boy partying at the Delta House Fraternity. It’s got it all: Food fight. Toga party. Drinking. Drugs. Sex. Add a fight against the administration (and those rich assy Omega boys)… and, well… college life has never been so outrageous.


Friday, June 12, 2009

Be Thankful in Everything

Are we being thankful in our life or take things for granted?

I AM THANKFUL:


FOR THE WIFE
WHO SAYS IT'S EGGS N BACON TONIGHT, BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME, AND NOT OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE.









FOR THE HUSBAND
WHO IS ON THE SOFA, BEING A COUCH POTATO,
BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS.







FOR THE TEENAGER
WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING DISHES, BECAUSE IT MEANS SHE IS AT HOME, NOT ON THE STREETS.









FOR THE TAXES I PAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM EMPLOYED .










FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS.














FOR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT A LITTLE TOO SNUG
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE ENOUGH TO EAT.









FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WORK
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM OUT IN THE SUNSHINE.













FOR A LAWN THAT NEEDS MOWING, WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING, AND GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE A HOME.












FOR ALL THE COMPLAINING I HEAR ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT
BECAUSE IT MEANS WE HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH.
















FOR THE PARKING SPOT I FIND AT THE FAR END OF THE PARKING LOT
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM CAPABLE OF WALKING AND I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH TRANSPORTATION.











FOR MY HUGE HEATING BILL
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM WARM.











FOR THE LADY BEHIND ME IN CHURCH WHO SINGS OFF KEY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I CAN HEAR.










FOR THE PILE OF LAUNDRY AND IRONING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE CLOTHES TO WEAR.











Live well, Laugh often, & Love with all of your heart!













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Wednesday, June 10, 2009

12 Spectacular Summer Food Festivals

It seems that for every type of food, there’s a festival—and why not? With the summer season approaching, it’s the perfect time to hit the road and celebrate your favorite foods at one of the hundreds of festivals taking place around the country.Here is a dozen of the most eagerly-awaited celebrations in the coming months. Many of the annual events have already gained national media buzz, while others are simply an opportunity for friends and family to bond over a favorite food. Whether its sweet Maine lobster or taste bud-blazing Buffalo chicken wings you crave, there’s sure to be at least one festival here to whet your appetite.

Sweet Corn Fest

Nothing says summer quite like a stalk of sweet corn on the cob—stamped with fresh grill lines and slathered with creamy butter. Starting on September 2nd in Millersport, Ohio, the Historic Lions Park hosts a celebration dedicated to the season’s most popular veggie. The festival combines an array of down-home cookin’ with events like a tractor tug pull, a corn-eating contest and music performances from popular country artists. For more information, visit SweetCornFest.com.


Gourmet Chili Pepper and Salsa Festival

Spice up your summer in Fredericksburg, Texas, at this Longhorn State extravaganza. This spectacular outing, starting on July 24th, is complete with an air balloon show and an array of specialty vendors, such as jam stands, nut nooks and salsa shacks—and that’s just the beginning. Hosted at Wildseed Farms, home to numerous fields of colorful peppers—sweet, hot and ornamental alike—this spicy-hot festival’s Scoville rating is off the charts! For more information, visit Tex-Fest.com.


Maine Lobster Festival

Fresh. Hot. Maine. Lobster. Need we say more? At noon on July 29th, the gates to Harbor Park in Rockland officially open for start of the 62nd Annual Maine Lobster Festival. Guests can enjoy a plethora of exhibition tents, booths and vendors—along with plenty of lobster-inspired fun! Favorite events include the Maine Sea Goddess competition, an all-you-can-eat pancake breakfast, a lobster crate race and an amateur-only lobster cook-off. For more information, visit MaineLobsterFestival.com.


Georgia Peach Festival

Peach County, Georgia, officially kicks off its annual week-long peach festival at 7:30 pm on June 12th with a free concert and fireworks display. Don’t miss events like a free serving of the “World’s Largest Peach Cobbler,” the Miss Georgia Peach Pageant and the Painting of the Peaches, during which event artists paint peaches on the pavement leading into the festival! For more information, visit WorldsLargestPeachCobbler.com .


Louisiana Watermelon Fest

Beginning July 23rd, pink and green watermelons rule the town of Farmerville, Louisiana, for three wild-and-crazy days. Seed-spitting attendees can participate in the Watermelon Hunt, Watermelon Eating Contest and Miss Louisiana Watermelon Contest—and of course enjoy juicy slices of the quintessential summertime fruit. For more information, visit LAWatermelonFestival.com


National Cherry Festival

This summer, celebrate cherries and community at the national Cherry Festival in Traverse City, Michigan. Starting on 4th of July weekend, festival attendees can join in on events like a cherry pit spitting contest and a pie eating event. Plus, don’t miss Cherry Idol, a spin on the hit reality TV show American Idol, in which competitors are asked to sing an a cappella song of their choice in a one-minute audition. Finalists then compete throughout the eight days of the festival. For more info, visit CherryFestival.org.


Great Wisconsin Cheese Festival

Calling all cheese connoisseurs! Beginning June 5th, the city of Little Chute will host Wisconsin’s 21st annual cheese festival and charity event (all proceeds are donated to the community). For three days, beginning at 5:00PM on Friday evening, food booths, novelty booths, children's rides and games will be scattered throughout Doyle Park. However, what really makes this a festival of fromage are events like cheese carving demonstrations, the big cheese breakfast, the cheesecake contest, free cheese tastings and more! For a full list of events, visit LittleChuteWI.org.


Pierogi Fest

Celebrate everyone’s favorite potato dumplings at the Pierogi Fest in Whiting, Indiana, beginning July 24th. What started as a way to honor the Eastern European heritage of many in the nearby communities has grown into an event that has been featured on The Food Network and in the pages of Bon Appetit magazine. Fun-filled activities include a pierogi eating contest, a pierogi toss and a polka parade! Last year’s festival even featured the “World’s Largest Pierogi,” which was made with 27 lbs of flour, 18 eggs, 58 potatoes, two gallons of water, “too much” butter and “lots o’ onions.” Total weight? 92 lbs! For more information, visit PierogiFest.net.


Yarmouth Clam Festival

July is no time to clam up; if you’re in Maine anytime from the 17th to the 19th head on over to Yarmouth and enjoy an array of delicious clam dishes—including whole fried clams in crumbs, fried clam strips, clam cakes, crab rolls, steamed clams and more. The featured event is a clam-shucking contest (pictured above)! Plus, look out for the events mascot Steamer the Clam! For more information, visit ClamFestival.com.


Gilroy Garlic Festival

Stop and smell the “stink rose”! Christmas Hill Park in Gilroy, California, is home to the famous Gilroy Garlic Festival starting on July 24th. Last year’s festival attracted over 100,000 attendees, and throughout its 30-year history, the festival has raised over $8 million dollars for various charities. Among the anticipated events are the Great Garlic Cook-Off and the Miss Gilroy Garlic Pageant. The gourmet garlic menu includes garlic bread, garlic fries, garlic calamari and much more! For more information, visit GilroyGarlicFestival.com.


Salmon Festival

Hosted right on the world-famous Copper River is the Copper River Wild Salmon Jam Music Festival in Cordova, Alaska. On July 9thth through the 11th, join in on the celebration of artistic talent and the promotion of the health and sustainability of local salmon runs. The headlining event? Salmon Jam Music festival, with (who else?) musical guests the Sweating Salmon. For more information, visit CopperRiverWild.com.


National Buffalo Wing Festival

The first of this fiery festival’s three (!) buffalo wing eating contests begins at 6:00PM on the Friday of Labor Day weekend. Sample more than 100 different styles of chicken wings from almost two dozen restaurants. Once you’ve had your fill of wings, stick around to watch the Blue Cheese Bowl, during which competitors aim to pluck as many chicken wings from a kiddie pool filled to the bring with blue cheese dressing! For more info, visit BuffaloWing.com.


Tuesday, June 9, 2009

It's hard being a dog today

Ohh these poor little dogs just make me laugh!LOL!







































 

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